I have been so poorly….I’m still not quite right, but man I’m SO much better than I was. Thank you to all you tweeters for your variously novel and disgusting  sounding remedy suggestions…

I have whinged, and sneezed, and whined and lain wanly and pathetically like that painting of the dying Thomas Chatterton, I’ve even been entertainingly delirious at one stage (during which I had some CRAZEE waking-dream idea for a blog post which now makes no sense at all. Fortunately I was too ill to type or post it). I have gone deaf and lost my voice, and am currently at the mildly husky, everything sounds like I’m lying in the bath stage of recovery.

I have returned a number of briefs (damn damn damn), realising that mouthing words without sound does not make for the most compelling advocacy (I did once attend court with manflu. I wept in the robing room and then had to whisper my application to adjourn to the judge as the sweat ran down my back (roughly speaking it went : look judge, I don’t think I can cross examine 7 witnesses in one day with no voice and a raging fever. I’m regretting driving here in the first place and wondering if I’ll get back home without crashing)). I didn’t do that this time. This time I just returned the briefs.

So. I have blown my nose a million times into a million tissues. Somewhere a small landfill is entirely full of my gunky snotrags.

I have coughed and coughed and coughed and coughed almost to the point of aneurism.

I have endured the red hot poker of sinus pain.

I have feasted on cough mixture and decongestant and pain relief. And yoghurt. And satsumas.

And I have got very very behind with my work.

But today good people of the blogosphere : I feel a bit human. Today, on day 11 of the manflu I realised I was doing a jaunty little walk back from the sandwich shop in the chill air, with the clear sun beaming down. Because my shoulders weren’t aching and I was actually starving. So, my continuing sniffles, my poor poor sore red nose, and my irritating hack are all manageable now. Cos I’m on the mend. And life is good. So it’s safe for you to look at my timeline again.

I even wrote a blog for The Transparency Project tonight : Imaginary judges use imaginary powers to reform imaginary law, which, I think you’ll agree is a title to be proud of. Or possibly I’m still hallucinating.